SCAMMERS NEW ANTHEM; MUGU DON PAY !!!

Sylva Nze Ifedigbo
Mugu don pay, shout halleluiah!!!, so goes the lines of one of the newest melodies on the Nigerian airwaves, a song by hitherto little known Kelly Hanson, a US based Nigerian youngster who has suddenly catapulted into the status of a celebrity following the dropping of his hit single “Maga Don Pay”.

Beyond the great production, wonderful sound mix and I dare say, intelligence that went into the packaging of the song, is a huge moral question-one that seems the biggest bane to the advancement my generation and by extension constitutes the greatest impediment to the eventual emancipation of our dear country by we the future leaders.

The song is a testimony to the fact that we now not only do fraud, we take pride in celebrating it.

It reminds one of Nkem Owoh’s I go chop your dollar and Olu Maintain’s Yahoozee both of which enjoyed great listenership among youths. In both cases as in this, the artists denied having a first line intension of promoting fraud, claiming they did what they did for the love of music and the arts. I am a great fan of Nigerian music and I appreciate creativity a lot, but I wish to disagree with the artists on this.

Music is a strong medium of communication which holds a strong influence on the people. From time immemorial, people have used music to pass a wide range of messages across, the more popular ones being messages against issues that affect the course of humanity negatively. For example Michael Jackson’s Earth song drew the world’s attention to the degradation and bastardization of the earth as a fall out of various human activities. Closer home, Fela’s many afro beat hits which remain ever fresh in our minds were a series of constructive criticism of bad leadership and a constant advocator for good governance.

When you listen and sing along to these songs, you find your self-beyond the movement of your body in a dance-reflecting on the wordings. Believe it or not what you hear has a huge influence on you. For example in the early 90’s, the explosion of American rap music in Nigeria and the orchestrating of the then Tu-pac Vs Notorious BIG rivalry contributed chiefly in the introduction of gangsterism among youths in Nigeria and a subsequent explosion of cultism on our campuses.

We appreciate the fact-shamefully though- that Nigeria is today known world over as a country of fraudsters, scammers, dupes and internet tricksters. It’s no more news that internet fraud has now become the major occupation of many youths. Daily, young men (and women) sit around in cyber café’s or even in the comfort of their bed rooms with the provision of internet service by most telecom operators, doing one thing- employing their intelligence and ingenuity in seeking ways to get other innocent internet users part with their money or materials.

Those who succeed go about living a life of luxury-one only obtainable from someone who didn’t sweat to make the money- and we see them around in our streets and on our campuses, driving expensive cars and playing their car CD so loud as if to announce to every one around that “hey a big boy is around”. The painful part is that we-the host of those who have either not made it or who do not even engage in it, hail them, discuss them, and by our reverence turn them into celebrities.

That is already bad enough. The EFCC may or may not be winning the fight against cyber crimes-we wish them well- but it becomes a different issue altogether when we become the vanguards of this despicable way of life by using Music to celebrate it.

What Kelly Hanson just did was to provide a song for our morally bankrupt internet tricksters popularly known as yahoo-yahoo boys to, in company of their kinds, wine dine and celebrate their evil activities. While this leaves him-Kelly Hanson- smiling to the bank, it leaves us more morally bankrupt and sinks us further in the murky waters of international disgrace and ridicule.

How does one even associate such issue as fraud with a religious word like halleluiah? Mugu-a victim- don pay-has fallen prey-and you celebrate it by shouting halleluiah. Does this in any way suggest a heavenly acknowledgement of the success? Don’t we think we are reducing this special-spiritual- word to nothingness by associating it with such soiled and tainted exploits as internet fraud?

Wole Soyinka once acknowledged that his was a wasted Generation. It is painful to admit now that my own generation is not faring better. We are raising a people who have not only closely copied their leaders but are fast fashioning ways of even outdoing them. Carry out a poll of a hundred youths and 99.9% of them will admit-without shame- that when they get into power they will also steal.

My claim finds credence in our eagerness to cut corners and obtain things free and fraudulently. Two weeks ago, the whole country was thrown into frenzy as people went even into refuge dumps scavenging for used MTN recharge cards, in order to cash in on a technical problem MTN was experiencing. So many loaded free units and boasted about it gleefully. What does this say of us as a people?

While I don’t have any thing against Kelly Hanson, if any thing, I think he is a pack of talents, I have every thing against his song. I disagree with him on promoting fraud and celebrating internet scammers. I insist that there are many more issues to sing about and make money order than fraud. I hold very strongly that his song is a bad influence on our youths and if we want to turn this country around, we must have less of his type of music on the airwaves.

This call goes out not only to musicians; it also goes out to our nollywood directors and publishers of Society magazines. Stop celebrating affluence as if that is all there is to life. Stop promoting thievery of any form. Stop making it look as though we all have to do the same thing to succeed. Stop toying with the fleeting sensibilities of our extremely gullible youths. The effects of these are overwhelming and we all are victims of it.

Sylva Nze Ifedigbo
nzeifedigbo@yahoo.com

THE TWO MOST LUCRATIVE BUSINESSES IN NIGERIA

Sylva Nze Ifedigbo

Very seriously, if you have some money starched out some where which you want to invest in Nigeria, your best bet is to start up a church or a private school. You can be sure of these; strong patronage, huge short term return on investment, tax freedom, safety of investment and a guaranteed juicy long term financial outlook. You can take this information to the bank.

This does not have anything to do with holding a degree from Harvard or the London Business School. This is pure, practical Nigerian investment reality. Global credit crunch or not, these two businesses are sure to continue to not just thrive, but expand greatly.

These two businesses however show, more than any other example, that Nigeria is a very sick nation.
Church business on the one hand is the exploitation of a peoples misplaced and exaggerated spirituality, borne out of the hardships they are facing and the baseless fear of the unknown. Operators of this business have a simple task of continuously orchestrating the peoples helplessness and gullibility to such issues as ill health, poverty and unemployment (which are all outcomes of a failure of leadership in the country) to remain in business. Quite Simple.

Private school business on the other hand reminds us of the systemic breakdown and shameful rot in our public school system. It is the cashing in on the need to fill up the vacuum created by the failure of public schools and to satisfy the people’s desperate need for education in what ever form it comes. But then, it is not just about being desperate for education, it is about having the money to pay for it.
Owning any of both businesses is so simple. For the church business, you don’t even need to register with any body. Just build or hire a hall, batcher or even a good tree shed, place in some plastic white chairs, get a microphone, a pulpit stand and an offertory box. Depending on the style you prefer, begin to advertise the sudden discovery of you anointing, and make sure you spice it up with your ability to cure all sorts of ailments and to perform outstanding miracles. You can simulate a third world war situation in the country, it is permitted. Tell the people that all the demons on earth have gathered here and have sworn not to leave until we are all ruined. Tell them, they are the specific target of some extra terrestrial super power witches. Tell them, their neighbor or mother in-law, or landlady are responsible for the troubles that have beset them and make sure you convince them that you, you alone has the solution to all their problems. What ever, just make sure they continue to part with their meager hard earned income.

To ensure success in the business, you have to be a good orator, a psychologist, a dramatist and a perfect con-artist. It is important to hold your congregation spell bound at all time and to make them revere you as an Omni potent being. Very importantly, you must run the business like a sole proprietorship. You alone should give the directives and no one should question your authority. Any of your close associates who gets too ambitious should be disgraced, called an agent of the devil, ostracized and ex-communicated. Your only confidant should be your wife, who should share your anointing and for easy of administration a council of elders who join in sharing the booty on pay day.
Returns on investment are huge. Sources include: Sunday and weekday fellowship offertory collections, seed sowing, fruit plucking, tithes, launchings, special thanksgivings, gifts to you, sales of audio and VCD’s, sales of ornaments, uniforms, holy oil, holy water, blessed candle, donations, sales of bibles and all sorts of books.

Nigerian laws provide that to start a private school, you should be registered by appropriate agencies, but the rate at which these schools proliferate around our streets and corners and the way they operate leaves one doubting if really any registration is actually going on. If there is a doubt on the registration, then surely, monitoring of their activities is non existent. With that, private school owners can do what they want with both their pupils and workers.

Personal residents, batchers, shacks, cubicles, unmarked buildings and very shabby structures can be used as private schools. All that is required to legitimize the operation is a sign board which says among other things “Government Approved”. One very important thing however is that, the school fees must be mind burgling.

The mind burgling fee does not necessarily translate into a good pay for the teachers. Unemployment is so high that giving them a job was enough privilege. If they were not ready to take the peanuts thrown their way, they were free to leave. So many others are out there begging to get in. what the teachers are teaching doesn’t equally matter. What mattered was that the school made a good result during the external exams. Accomplishing that is easy; know the right people in the external exam bodies and grease the right palms and your students will have a field day cheating on exam day.
With the good result, patronage is ensured as parents desperate to have their children get ‘good education’ will keep rushing your way. Good education here doesn’t necessarily mean intellectual competence but a certificate that qualifies them for a place in a secondary school or a university. A record of ‘good results’ will also open another vista of opportunity for you. Candidates will come flying in from far and near to register for external exams in your school-where they can cheat with confidence. Double the registration fee and keep smiling to the bank.

With private schools as it is with the churches, there is large room for expansion. You could start as a nursery school then expand in record time to have a primary, secondary and even a university. That way, you can keep your customers from the start to the finish. The beauty of this business is that once you have established yourself, you can review your fees and charges at will. Your customers won’t leave, because they don’t have any option as the government owned public schools are an eye sour. They will continue to scrape out what they can from their meager incomes to pay you. Good business don’t you think?

Perhaps these are the kind of investments our leaders talk about when they junket the globe at our expense to invite foreigners to Nigeria to invest.

Both businesses exploits us as a people and it is a sad tale that both flourish because of the complete failure of good governance. A person with a well paying job has no business being in a church gathering by 9.00am on a Monday morning, and will have less cause to continue contributing to the wealth of his pastor, in the way of seed sowing and all that from the little he has. Really, if the economy was what it should be, not too many people will find time to sit around listening to melodramatic men of God on the pulpit. They would be gainfully engaged in some worth while venture. Less we forget, hard work is one way by which we can truly Glorify God.

Like wise, if our government makes anything of its responsibility to provide free and qualitative education at all levels, we wouldn’t have all been turned into slaves of the private school owners. Recently, public school’s were shut for weeks because the long suffering teacher’s demand for a modest wage increase sounded meaningless to a government that increases the salary of political office holders at will.

Kofoworola Bello in The Nation of Thursday October 16th 2008, reported that the when in 2015 a roll call will be taken to determine which countries of the 164 that signed the Education For All (EFA) goal in Dakar in 2000, Nigeria will still be far from the target. In fact, the Global Monitoring Report for 2008 states that Nigeria will still be on the way by 2025. This is a target that smaller countries like Mauritius, Seychelles, Sao Tome and Principe are already set to meet.

Until our Government wakes up from her slumber-which they appear incapable of doing- we shall continue to be exploited by business men who cash in on the deficits of our society to make brisk business. In the meantime however, like someone-a man of God- told me in am e-mail in response to my article Nigerian Men of God as Con-Artists, there is enough room for every one in the business. So if you have the money, invest.

Sylva Nze Ifedigbo
nzeifedigbo@yahoo.com
www.nzesylva.wordpress.com

SAVING CITIZEN BEN EMMAN’S HOME

Sylva Nze Ifedigbo

Among the comment threads that followed the publication of my piece “Celebrating Dele Giwa and Unveiling the identity of his killers” on Nigeria Village Square was one strange but very important entry by an individual who signed his name as Ben Emman. The comment was strange because it had nothing to do with my article but very important as it was a request or better put an SOS appeal to Governor Rotimi Amaechi of River State to think again about his planned demolition of properties along the Eliogholo – Port Harcourt Airport road as part of efforts to widen the road by 450 feet on both sides.

Giving that I neither know Governor Amaechi or any of his an aides, nor am I a PDP member, a Port-Harcourt resident nor do I even know of any one that knows how to get to these people, my first impulse was to ignore the appeal which for all intent and purpose was directed to the wrong quarters seemingly, But on a second thought-a conscience induced re-think-, I decided to do something to help this citizen who perhaps out of the hopelessness of the situation had decided to tell the world of his problem, by indeed bringing the details of his plight to public knowledge and hoping that Governor Amaechi or any of his aides or friends might take a positive interest in it.

Citizen Ben Emman from his letter of appeal is a resident of the garden city of Port-Harcourt. According to him, he and other persons bought and developed the land along the Eliogholo-Port-Harcourt Airport when the area was uninhabitable and had lived there for years. Recently, the out gone government of Peter Odili dualised the said road which led to the demolition of the hard earned properties of many people most of whom are yet to recover from it till date. It thus comes as a rude shock to him and other residents that there is yet again another proposal by the new Governor to widen the already dualised road by 450 feet this time for the purpose of erecting high-rise buildings.

Citizen Ben, who said he was still servicing the loans he took from a co-operative society some time ago to help him in developing his property is asking the modest privilege of the satisfaction that comes from living in his own house as he has no where else to head to if Governor Amaechi makes good his plans.

Ben Emman’s touching story reminds me of the El-rufai demolition craze a while back in Abuja. I live in Abuja so I am in a position to tell the kind of unquantifiable hardship many Nigerian families had to go through for no fault of theirs. Many persons including retired parents watched as all they’ve work for all their lives were leveled flat by the El-Rufai bulldozers. Many of them couldn’t survive it with the many recorded cases of death from Hign b.P. those that did survive had to most despicably, begin again.

It would be easy for any one not affected to sit around and talk about “master plan” and “Beautification”. But it was a whole different experience to have your properties lying around in the open and the structure you’ve called home for so long being leveled by a bulldozer. Alas, the FCT Senate committee has revealed the fraud which El-rufai supervised as minister but the damage done to many Nigerians can not now be undone.

I am not familiar with the said Eliogholo-Port-Harcourt Airport Road, in fact I have hardly ever been to Port-Harcourt, neither am I familiar with what ever plans Governor Amaechi has for the Road, but whatever it is, I guess it is important he thinks again about it.

Governance must have a human face. What ever one does as a leader must be to better the life of the led. Any policy or project that has the propensity to even in the remotest way affect the lives of a portion of the led negatively without any plans to cushion or ameliorate such effects can best be described as wickedness and if Governor Rotimi Amaechi feels he indeed has the mandate of the Rivers people and by extension has their welfare in mind, he should listen to this special appeal.

It is pertinent to even ask what justification the said High-rise structures the Governor wants to build has. How will such a project better the lives of the citizens? Is it really worth demolishing people’s homes for?

If however the said project must go on for whatever reason, it should be the responsibility of the River State Government to first consult with the people that would be affected, make adequate plans to compensate or re-settle them, ensure they are re-settled or adequately compensated, before sending in the bulldozers.

Like I have noted in a couple of my writings, Nigerians are a traumatized people already with the harsh economic realities of the day almost driving us all nuts. Any attempt, this time by our leaders, to further compound the mess they have put us all into over the years will be most unbearable and I dare say unacceptable.

I am therefore calling on all well meaning Nigerians, both at home and abroad, the media, civil society groups, NGO’s, freelance lawyers, Human Right activists and you the reader to join forces in what ever little way you can to help save Citizen Ben Emman’s home. It is the least we can do in being our neighbours keeper.

Let me conclude this piece with the exact words of Ben Emman in his appeal:

I am strongly appealing to Governor Rotimi Amaechi to consider the mess that many families will be put into by this singular act. It would be good to mention here that some of the landlords are widows and even jobless men. The fact that they have a roof on their heads makes life a little bearable for such people. I wonder what would be their fate should this plan materialize.

I beg the Governor in the name of God to reconsider this plan and as well imagine the pains that it will bring to many lives and families. Many to-be-affected people, if the plan is finally executed, may never come out of this mess for years to come.

I hope Governor Amaechi listens.

Sylva Nze Ifedigbo

nzeifedigbo@yahoo.com 08063767306

CELEBRATING DELE GIWA AND UNVEILING THE IDENTITY OF HIS KILLERS

Sylva Nze Ifedigbo
It was in this month some twenty two years ago, that cowardice took a whole new meaning. Precisely, on October 19th 2008, it would be twenty two years since the blast from a letter bomb packaged by yet to be identified person(s) sent one of the greatest icons of journalism in this country-Dele Giwa- to an early grave at a little short of forty years of age.
In 1986, I was just two years old, far too young to have understood any thing happening. So I can’t boast of having had a personal knowledge of this great man, a privilege I wished I had had, but a starch of old magazines and news papers which my dad happens to be good in keeping afforded me the opportunity of meeting this rare gem one-on-one through his many issue oriented writings and critical columns and I feel an overwhelming urge to share what I know with the world as we count down to the twenty second anniversary of his death.
Dele Giwa founding editor of NewsWatch magazine was a rare Nigerian who believed so much in journalism that he lived and died for it. With a blunt, firm and forthright resolve, he told the truth and damned the consequences.
With guts and extreme confidence in himself, Dele Giwa acknowledged that he was in the business of making enemies but was ready to make them in the overriding interest of a great Nigerian state. He saw this interest as the responsibility of the press to protect and he blazed the trail in that regard.
D G as he was fondly called believed so much in Nigeria and was said to have once boasted that Nigerians were unshakable. Alas, his death shook the nation a great deal but we carried on. He was known for his unyielding opposition to bad leadership at all levels and uncompromising zeal to expose the misdeeds of public office holders and their collaborators. He condemned crime in all its ramifications and never shied away from openly stating so both in speech and in writing. He called a spade a spade and was never known to cut corners.
Above all, D G was very dedicated to his job. In simple terms, he was a workaholic and would not undermine excellence for any reason. He abhorred sloppy jobs and was quick to rebuke even his top colleagues at Newswatch when found wanting. He hated cheats and liars, was firm and decisive, yet humble and friendly. His bravery and strong personality combined to single him out among his contemporaries. Most of all, he was a good family man; a caring father and a loving husband.
Here was a true patriot and a national hero of the first degree. It was most relieving to have seen his name among the list of Nigerians who were recently honoured with Street names by the FCT minister. It took twenty two years, but then, better than never. But I think we should have done more to immortalize this person who bequeathed to Nigeria the spirit of service to one’s country even in the face of personal discomfort and insecurity.
While the search for his killers might have remained inconclusive all these years, I wish to note that in our society today, we can identify many Dele Giwa Killers. We see his killers in all those who are against the passage of the Freedom of Information bill, in those people who are quick to lock up television stations and arrest their staff for doing their job in the name of ‘security’. We see his killers in those who steal election victory and manipulate both the judiciary and the masses such that they remain in power no matter what. We identify the unknown killers in all those public office holders who mistake the public vault for their trouser pockets, looting so much that one begins to question their sanity.
All those who cut corners and delight in shoddy jobs stink of Dele Giwa’s blood. All those government contractors who have perfected the art of the more you look the less you see- those who will do the job at half the quality, those who will collect the mobilization fee but will never complete the job and those who will be paid even without knowing where the site for the project is.
We recognize D G’s killers in a legislature that spend the better part of the year manipulating the budget and an executive that seems simply confused and helpless. In a judiciary that gives justice to the highest bidder no matter the weight of evidence to the contrary and a police that is irretrievably corrupt and disorganized.
All those who oppose free speech at any level and engage in acts that negatively affects the lives of over 140 million Nigerian both as public officers and as private individuals are the killers we’ve been searching for and it is time we fished them out and made them face the book.
If those cowards who hatched and executed the letter bomb murder of D G thought that they would succeed in silencing him forever, it is a pity that his death only gave rise to many more biting journalist and journalistic forums like own dear Sahara Reporters and many others that are much to the distaste of the killers, telling it the way it is-pointblank- like Dele Giwa did.
So, twenty two years after, we are not mourning but celebrating the life and times of this icon that is a representation of the kind of people we-youths- should have as role model. We might not all be journalists or possess the talent of writing well, but we could still pursue excellence and the great ideals he exemplified by aspiring to be the best we can be in our chosen fields. As Roosevelt once said;
“No man is worth his salt
Who is not ready at all times
To risk his well being, to risk his body,
To risk his life, in a great course.”
Sylva Nze Ifedigbo
nzeifedigbo@yahoo.com

Mr. President is so uninspiring!!!

Sylva Nze Ifedigbo
I have never been a fan of President Yar’Adua. This is not about any personal beefs, I guess I am simply not a great fan of people who steal their way to power, agree they stole it, but then, refuse to leave. Right from that day I and other voters including the Vice Chancellor of the University of Nigeria, waited on end at the polling station on campus for voting materials that never arrived, I knew that what ever government that came out of the whole charade would not at the least, enjoy my admiration what so ever.
So, I have since May 2007 treated Mr. President, his seven point agenda, and his vision 2020 hullabaloo with suspect and wherever possible, I had offered my words of criticism, whatever its worth. Recently, however, I thought it might just be fair if I (on a personal note) gave the man a chance to convince me-beyond the annoying seven point balderdash adverts on NTA- that he really had any worthwhile plans for this Country. ‘Plans’ at least.
The October 1st, National day Presidential broadcast looked like a good opportunity to really listen to the rarely talking President and I had looked forward to it. I woke up early and graciously there was light. I was in high spirit that morning, I even sang along as the national anthem was played just before the broadcast. By the time the rather short speech was over, I felt like some one who just received the news of the sudden death of a loved one.
Without sounding insolent (I hope the SSS doesn’t pick me up) and being very honest, that was one of the dullest, drabbest, frailest and almost banal speeches I have listened to in recent time, delivered likewise in the most uninspiring and unmoving of ways.
Perhaps I have had a little too much of moving rhetoric’s on television following the build up to the US elections or may be I was expecting too much, but what I got was simply not it. It looked more like an unsure and stage frightened nursery pupil, reading a rhyme before the school assembly.
From my understanding, a leader should be someone who can by his words and actions drive his people into doing something without even thinking. He should be able to make them see success even when every where looked gloomy. He should at the least be very informed and convinced of his ideas and plans and should be able to dish it out to his people with a passion that would make them not only share the vision but also own it. Mr. President was far from this module of leadership last Wednesday.
At this critical state in our national life, when every thing is upside down, one would have expected a speech that would wake us up from our depression, reassure us that we are on course, and ultimately set us on a path to achieving the much desired national re-awakening. If only wishes were horses…
Aside the fact that the speech was delivered in the trade mark slow, dull and easy going style, it lacked any thing tangible which a people so desolate and confused can hold on to as a ray of hope for the future. The essential message of the speech was that: we should prepare for more suffering.
There is nothing to remember about the speech, no line you could commit to memory, no cheering news that you could take to the bank. Mr. President took time to reel out economic indices and all those jargons a greater percentage of Nigerians (both literate and illiterate) do not understand about a very fat external reserve, about a 6.9% growth and about a single digit inflation rate. So what? How does all those grammar affect the life of many Nigerian families who could not afford rice for the sallah celebration? Or the many more who would sleep tonight on an empty stomach?
Then somewhere along the line he said something about a Concession Commission that would give out our roads to people who will rehabilitate them and collect payments from we road users-the ordinary Nigerians- until they recoups their investment. By the arrangement, Government spends nothing on the roads, it is we, the impoverished lot that will at the end indirectly pay for what ever repairs the roads get. Indirectly, we are repairing the roads ourselves. What kind of idea is this?
Since when has it stopped being the responsibility of Government to build and repair roads? Have we so failed that our Government will so openly admit its incapability to function by conceding her duties to individuals? Did I hear this same people say they want to make us a first world country in 2020? Nonsense!
Then as if to restate the fact that the journey to his fantasy 2020 will be one slow and unsteady one, Mr. President, quite frankly warned us that there is no quick fix to the Problems of Nigeria. Little wonder he had been nicknamed ‘Baba go-slow’ a long time ago. I guess, we all appreciate that the task ahead is enormous and can not be handled over night, but then, all we ask is that if it has to be slow, could it be at least steady?
Nigerians have proven to be a never say die people, and are ready to patiently follow their leaders. All we ask for is a show of genuine will, backed up with concrete developmental plans and actions that can-even in the remotest ways- restore our eroded confidence in the entity called Nigeria.
Incase, they-the Government- are not aware that the people have lost confidence in this nation, they could take out time to visit either the British or United States embassies or even that of South Africa, and see for themselves how Nigerians especially the young-the so called future leaders- are enduring all sorts of hardships and insults just to get out of this enclave.
If that speech, contained all Mr. President has to offer, then we might as well all start praying that something positive happens at the Supreme Court or else, we would simply be marking time until the end of his tenure.
And as an advice to Mr. President’s Speech writers, go and read the works of Churchill, Thatcher, Luther king jnr, Obama, Ghandi, Zik or even our own dear Oshiomole, to find the right words to employ in inspiring a confused and desolate people, for as it is now, one might not need a lullaby to sing a child to sleep when President Yar’Adua is making a speech.
Sylva Nze Ifedigbo
nzeifedigbo@yahoo.com
www.nzesylva.wordpress.com