Mixed Marriages and the Southeast

Sylva Nze Ifedigbo

When a Catholic man weds a non catholic female it doesn’t steer up much controversy save for the baptism (or re-baptism) of the lady involved and administration of the sacrament of the Eucharist. The lady becomes whole and whole Catholic just like her husband. They become one. But when a Catholic lady intends to marry a non catholic man a serious controversy steers up.

Here is the issue. There has always been this age long law of the Catholic Church as regards to mixed marriages. From a very strict position, the Vatican in 1966 as part of some minor reforms relaxed some of the law. The Holy See in the document softened some restrictions and eliminated the penalty of excommunication for Catholics who are married before a non-Catholic clergyman. This provision is automatic and retroactive. For the non-Catholic partner, the impact of the promise that children born of the marriage be baptized and raised in the Catholic faith was softened. The nuptial Mass may be celebrated, the nuptial blessing imparted, and a clergyman of another faith may assist at the marriage of a Catholic and a non-Catholic. (see 1966 Religion Archive Article of Microsoft ® Encarta ® 2009).

One place where apparently the 1966 relaxation of the mixed marriage law has not taken effect is South-East Nigeria. Here, a lady marrying a non Catholic man is viewed almost as an anathema or a sacrilege. The trauma undergone by the persons involved is better imagined. The biggest victims in most cases are the parents of the bride who have to withstand the greatest challenge to their faith. It is often a case of choosing between the wishes/happiness of their Children or respect for the Church. This trauma is transferred to the children in forms only those who have experienced it can explain.

Spelling it out, in most parts of south east Nigeria today, the parents of a lady wishing to marry a non catholic stand the risk of excommunication. I am very certain of the situation in many towns in the region. In fact to the minds of the Catholic villagers there, such a thing should not even be mentioned to the hearing of the ear.

Where the normal practice of the lady dragging her would be husband to the Catholic church for the wedding is done, the lady and her husband have to promise (I prefer to say swear) that the lady will maintain her faith after the wedding and that children born of the marriage would be baptized and raised in the Catholic faith.

For the purposes of proceeding with the marriage usually, the couples make this promise, but do they keep it afterwards? Since there is usually no mechanism to enforce the promise the couples made before the marriage, why insist on the law in the first place? Is the Catholic Church not just holding onto something that has been overtaken by events; a law that is both retrogressive and archaic?

Out side the need to keep people within the faith which informs the insistence that both wife and children remain Catholics, isn’t the Church simply causing more troubles for such mixed marriages? How does it look that on a Sunday morning the wife dresses up and heads in a particular direction and the husband dresses up and heads in a different direction. What does this portend for the unity and oneness of a family which is critical to the success of marriages? Aren’t the two supposed to become one after wedding?

The offspring’s of these marriages are even in a greater dilemma. They are by the law supposed to be baptized in the Catholic Church and to follow their mother to that church. The father we know is still the head of the family. How many fathers with the ego that goes with being one in Africa would see his children going against his own faith? Does a situation where father and mother are in a battle to secure the allegiance of their children to their own faith mean well for any marriage?

The questions here in summary are, why make couple make promises they wouldn’t ultimately keep? Why indirectly encourage instability and lack of unity in marriages? And thirdly, why threaten parents who had no hand whatsoever in determining the person their daughter met and fell in love with, with excommunication if she doesn’t wed in the Catholic Church?

I know a host of persons who have been held hostage by the insistence of some Parish Priests with Vatican I ideologies and conservative village Catholic communities who would not bulge or relax the law. We have a situation of parents some of who are high up in the catholic lay leadership and who are expected to know better insisting on their daughter’s compliance on the one hand and a daughter caught up in love and the desire for marriage on the other hand. The end result of most of the situations I have known of had not been very pleasant ones.

It is important to enquire if the practice in Southeast Nigeria does not negate the 1966 document of the Vatican to that effect. There is also enough reason to wonder why the situation appears worse in the southeast. Does it have to do with the traditions of the people, the age long battle for supremacy between the Catholics and the Anglicans, or does it have to do with the world view of the Bishops in this region?

This issue is a very disturbing one for my generation. In the absence of verifiable statistics, I can safely state that Catholics dominate the Christendom in Nigeria. Among these are many young ladies who need to get married. With increased association made possible by education, business and travel they meet with and have greater chances of falling in love with men of other Christian faiths. Should this law (or the obsession of some clergy men to enforce this law) be a hindrance to their pursing love and happiness?

nzeifedigbo@yahoo.com

www.nzesylva.wordpress.com

Now, i will retire

Now, I will retire.

“Once this goes right, I will retire”, the man tells himself as he paces the room. The business had been more lucrative than he had earlier imagined. It was a way of getting back from the society what the society had siphoned from his people for so many years. Each of his accounts in the twenty five banks had a handsome amount. The type he hitherto heard only when Governors were announcing contracts on television. Those contracts that never get executed.  Now he was taking his share. He was getting even with the society. But he thought it was a good time to retire. “I am not a criminal”, he thinks. “I am not like them, those rogues that run around town making plenty noise with their sirens. I am a freedom fighter” He reminds himself. “ I will retire after this deal”

He drops the shiny pistol on the table and picks up the phone. He needed the phone to ring. He dials a number and listens. There was no response at the other end. “wetin they happen now?” he musses and drops the phone again. His eye runs to his wrist. The twelve hours ultimatum would be expiring in two hours. He was eager to get this done. “Was thirty million still too much for them to pay?” he wonders. The negotiation process had been exhausting. He had been on the phone for close to an hour. At the end, he had to slice off twenty million. That was how generous he could get. The commodity was worth much more, but he needed to get this done with. Thirty million was a round enough figure.

There were two other calls he expected. Two other commodities had over stayed in the warehouse. The value of one had gone from twenty million to ten million and even now at two million, the owners didn’t seem in a hurry to come and claim him. This was the problem with dealing in locals. We didn’t have value for our own. He had told his boys the very day they brought in the commodity that he wasn’t worth much. Two weeks now and no deal yet. He was just consuming food for nothing. “May be I should further reduce his amount” the man thinks. “I can take one million. One million is a good price for a councilor”.

The other over stayed commodity in the warehouse was worth twenty million. She had been there for three days. How he hated keeping female commodities. He was a hard man, but not so hard in the face of the tears of a lady. She had been crying and throwing tantrums all day, asking to be released. She is a daughter of one of the traditional rulers. A princess. The intelligence information that she was visiting from England where she was a college student had been very accurate. She had strayed out to a club in Port Harcourt one night and never got back home. When the calls were made, her father, the Royal Highness had promised to deliver on schedule. Twenty million should be a chicken change for him. “Why was he now stalling?”

The man begins to pace the room again. His pistol is in hand. One thing he had learnt in this line of business was patience. Patience was a virtue. Be patient and a bit firm. It always worked. His very first mega deal, his breakthrough in the business had thought him that. Those seven white skins from Shell. It had made the news headlines. All the dailies reported it on the cover. Even CNN mentioned it.  He remembers how he had sat and watched with pride, a bottle of Squadron in hand. He had invested much in that deal. The seven whites had to receive a five star worth treatment in captivity. For a whole week, they made no demand. He was patient. Give time for the anxiety to build. The Government first threatened. Shell ran from pillar to post, evacuating all other offshore white skin staff to Port Harcourt. The home Governments of the seven soon began to mount pressure on Aso Rock. Aso Rock’s tone turned from threats to pleas. Then he rang out their demand. A hundred million for each head.

The state governor led the negotiation. He was a good negotiator. He had negotiated his way to the government house with the barrel of guns. The man had boys that had been stealing oil and selling for him from time immemorial. He was not different from the hostage takers. He had the whole state hostages. He knew that much. So when the bargaining began, he played ball. Forty Million was paid for each head. The Governor pocketed five million on each head, for his services as negotiator. The commander of the Army Task Force got a million on each head. The hostages were released and every body was happy. The governor and the army boasted on how they had secured the release of the hostages. No one mentioned the amount s that was involved. They said they didn’t negotiate.

Another big deal had been the capture of a top politicians aged mother. The man had been running his mouth in Abuja about the situation in the Niger Delta. He said the freedom fighters were mere criminals. When his Mother disappeared, he came crying. Obviously he loved his mother very much.  The ransom was paid in full, right from the Central Bank. A week later, he evacuated both his parents and everyone related to him to the safety of the Federal Capital.

Once, a young man; a university student – a spoilt son of one money bag had contacted them requesting to be kidnapped. His father had been starving him of pocket money for a while now. He had flunked all his exams in the university and his father wanted to show some anger. His monthly two million naira pocket money was withheld. He willingly submitted himself to be kidnapped. That way, he could force out some money from him stingy father. Ten million was demanded. The father bargained. Five million was agreed. The boy got his two million and went away happy.

And how he had been enjoying his proceeds. A Rover-Rover Sportage Jeep just joined his fleet. That fleet had a Hummer 2 and a Nissan Armada. Two new gun boats had only just arrived too. The oil bunkering division of his business had to remain one step ahead of the Army task force. Those liverless agents of tyranny. How he hated them. He enjoyed killing them. Once his boys sank a naval gun boat and killed three ratings on board. They had celebrated it with bottles of Rum. “I am a freedom fighter” he moans under his breath. His index finger caresses the pistol trigger.

Even a freedom fighter had the right to a retirement. His palatial villa in Yanegoa was ready for occupation. The oil bunkering would continue however. Those massive pipes that crisscrossed the creeks would guarantee his pension. After years of hearing from corrupt leaders that the solutions to their problems was in the pipeline, they had decided to break the pipeline and see for themselves what was in there and why it was taking such time to come out. What they saw was black gold. Indeed, the leaders were right after all. The solution to their problems was right there in the pipeline.

He thought briefly of what he would be doing in retirement. He would join a golf club. Yes, that’s what those retired Generals do. There wasn’t much difference between a retired General and a retired Freedom fighter. The similarities were more. They both had the right figures in their bank accounts. “I could even join a political party” he thought aloud. “May be I can contest for a seat in the legislature”. He knew at least three senators who were retired freedom fighters. “No. I will join the opposition. That’s what respectable freedom fighters do”. Being in the opposition as an ex-freedom fighter had it’s advantages. Each time you sneezed, the Government caught cold. There was no better security for your pension. And of course, the boys in the creek will still see you as one of their own.

The phone on the table rings. The man is jolted out of his thoughts. He moves over fast.  The caller number seems to excite him. He smiles. He lets it ring over and over. It was part of the strategy. He finally picks and sounds so impatient and uninterested. The call is short. The discussion is straight to the point. The call ends. A smile is on his face. Thirty million had been delivered. “Now, I will retire” he grins.

Sylva Nze Ifedigbo

Nigeria’s Corruption Diary for one week (Mon 4th May – Fri 8th May 2009)

It’s been an interesting week in Nigeria. Interesting not because we accomplished any outstanding feat,  but because of the many sad incidents of that same thing that have left us a pariah state and which Prof Dora thinks she can burnish with a wave of the hand; Corruption.

In just one week, we had news reports of brazen acts of high profile corruption involving such huge amounts that could sink the entire economy of some of our less endowed African states.

In this week, the PDP did what they do best. Employing their ‘do or die’ approach and with the express assistance of the cash n carry conscience of Ayoka Adebayo, they masterfully stole back Ekiti State even against the hue and cry of the people. Of course the Police and the Army were on ground to see that the people were fully repressed and for all their cared, we all can go to blazes, Oni has been returned elected.

But the women who walked naked in Ekiti in protest against the PDP don’t seem to have walked in vain. Disagreements over the sharing of an alleged 250 million naira bribe money by the INEC officials in Ido-Osi has since emerged. Ido-Osi we will recall was the theater of PDP’s rigging project. It was only there that some 19,000 people voted and of course close to 16,000 did so for the PDP. It was results from that LGA that made Ayoka Adebayo resign in the first instance and of course, it was the laughable figures from there that gave Oni victory.

The Police say it is quizzing the said INEC officials and that serious confessional statements have been made. If this issue is not treated Nigerian style, perhaps we might not wait for lengthy judicial processes to prove what we all know happened in Ido-Osi. The gods are not dead after all.

Still in this week, A top cop and EFCC’s Director of Operations was sent packing.  In an act that was enough to make us a laughing stock in the world, this man was found to have contracted out his studies and exams as a Law student at the University of Abuja.  This man is the head of Operations of Nigeria’s anti graft agency. Why then do we worry over the operations of the EFCC when one of its head is a common criminal buying his way to a Law degree?

Examination malpractice carries a punishment of 21 years in jail. I remember my school principal reading out those laws to us before the commencement of WAEC exams. Surely, the disgraced cop will not get 21 years. His case might never be mentioned again, but he has provided for us a big reason to question what happens at the University of Abuja.

It is not a hidden fact that as soon as our politicians rig their way to power and arrive Abuja, they immediately register for one program or the other at the University to shore up their credentials. Soon, you hear they have graduated, beaming with smiles in an academic gown. Most of them do the very same thing the former EFCC director of Operation was caught for. They bribe everybody from the dean to the cleaners. They only come to claim their degree after the duration of the program.

This time we had a cop, a law enforcement officer and one who carries the extra responsibility of ridding our society of financial crimes being caught in the act. In places like China, he would have been hanging by the neck, but in Nigeria, were such things are deemed normal; the man was just sacked from EFCC.

Still within this week, the EFCC seemingly waking up from deep sleep (perhaps following the sack of their Director of Operations who might have been the clog in the wheel) uncovered a massive scam of about 5.3Billion Naira. Billion I must repeat here for emphasis not Million. A senator and other official of the Ministry of power have been picked up for questioning while three House of Representative members involved are still plying hide and seek with the EFCC agents.

The money, 5.3 billion which was meant for Rural Electrification vanished. The senator, his cohorts in the House and the officials of the ministry preferred to electrify their pockets with the money. Coming on the heels of the seeming inability of the House to tell us what really happened to the 16billion dollars Independent Power Project, this tells us that darkness will remain one thing Prof. Dora will never re-brand in our National image.

Earlier in the week, the Minister of Works, Hassan Lawal on inspection of Federal Roads construction around the country had made a startling revelation, one that was enough to bring out the people of Anambra and indeed the entire southeast in violent protest. He revealed to the utter amazement of Governor Peter Obi and the journalists in his crew that contrary to the held belief, no contract was awarded for the construction of the second Niger Bridge.

Former President Obasanjo a professional maverick, had in the last days of his administration, when the campaigns were already high announced that the Federal Government had approved the construction of the long sought after bridge. It was said to be counterpart funded between the Federal Government and the Anambra state Government.

But the minister stated emphatically and would have sworn by the holy books had he been pressed further that no such thing existed in Governments records. It never happened, he stated. He didn’t deny Obasanjo saying so, but he was saying invariably that Obasanjo simply lied. Considering that he was a member of Obasanjo’s cabinet and a close one at that (one of the few who never lost their portfolios) he is in a position to know better. 

Invariably speaking therefore, Obasanjo said that as a campaign trick to cow the south east into voting PDP again. Imagine a President, the father of the nation, lying to the nation with a straight face on an issue as important as the second Niger Bridge which held so much to the economy of the nation. This president walks around free and plays statesman monitoring elections all over Africa.

As if to bring the week to a thrilling climax, a House Committee disclosed that 1.3 billion was paid by the Nigeria customs for the supply of two light surveillance aircrafts in 2007and in May 2009, the aircrafts have not yet arrived. Did the money grow wings or is it that the contractor vanished? In any case, what do we say about a Customs leadership that paid for an aircraft, it wasn’t supplied and they are so ok with it? The Comptroller General argues that only part payment was made, an audit report brandished by the Honourables stated otherwise, so who then is lying?

All these incidences of corruption happened or were revealed in just one week and we hardly took notice. In the US the diversion of some funds by officials of AIG was a huge scandal, one that took Television headlines for weeks and there were probes and all that. Here however, scandals of larger magnitudes hardly steer up any discourse because they’ve become normal occurrences and because nothing happens after its revelation.

Which way Nigeria? I beg to ask.

Sylva Nze Ifedigbo.

www.nzesylva.wordpress.com

The Re-branding of Conscience; Ayoka Adebayo as a case study.

“My conscience as a Christian will not allow me to further participate in this process” It was with these words that Mrs. Ayoka Adebayo resigned her appointment as the Ekiti State Resident Electoral Commissioner on April 28 2009. A series of events followed which has left every one in doubt of just what value Mrs. Adebayo’s conscience is worth.  It all came to a climax yesterday when she shamelessly and without recourse to her hitherto advertised Christian Conscience announced and returned Segun Oni of the PDP as winner of the protracted gubernatorial re-run election.

It first became obvious that so much dirty water was flowing under the bridge when the 74 year old electoral umpire after purportedly resigning her appointment and being declared wanted by the police arrived Abuja and had a closed door meeting with the wuruwuru master himself Prof Maurice Iwu the INEC chairman. She emerged from that meeting singing a new song. “I am still a member of the INEC family” she shouted and perhaps to confuse us all the more, she added “God bless Nigeria”.

Before that meeting, she had claimed that she had resigned as a result of the overwhelming pressure put on her to announce results that her conscience wouldn’t let her. Further investigations by journalists including a phone interview on Ray power fm with one of her aides revealed that trouble had started after results of the re-run election in Ido-Osi LGA were brought in. Mrs. Adebayo had rejected the result based on the fact that its collation was done in a Police station (not a designated collation center) without her permission and the said result was not signed for by the party agents. Both anomalies were against the provisions of the electoral act.

No one needed any special intelligence to decipher where the pressure was coming from. The PDP had allocated unimaginable figures to themselves in that LGA, enough to wipe out The AC’s 11,000 lead and needed her to announce that result and secure them victory.

After the Abuja meeting with Iwu, Mrs. Adebayo returned to Ado-Ekiti to finish her job. Elections held Tuesday 5^th May in the Oye and afterwards the final result was announced.

In an unbelievable U-turn, Mrs. Adebayo announced the tainted results from Ido-Osi, the same results her conscience had held her from announcing. The same results she had rejected before resigning. Her conscience suddenly took flight or perhaps it got rebranded after her meeting with Iwu. She in dealing a final blow to the hopes of the people for credible elections did the bidding of the PDP by announcing Oni as winner.

Why is the results from Ido-Osi an issue? Aside the fact that they did not meet the primary requirements of the electoral act (as initially stated by Adebayo her self), the figures as announced yesterday was itself suspect. PDP pooled almost 16000 votes with the AC recording just some 3000. The PDP will of course be fast in reminding us that Ido-osi is the base of their candidate, but has it occurred to any one that in all the 10 LGA where elections held it was only in Ido-Osi that over 19,000 people voted. In fact in most of the other LGA less than 5000 votes were recorded. Why such high figures from Ido-osi? Needless to add here that it was the Ido-Osi figures that gave Segun Oni the close to 4000 votes with which he emerged winner over Fayemi.

The fraud here is so obvious. Once again The PDP gets away with massive electoral fraud and this time they did it with the active connivance of the re-branded conscience of Mrs. Ayoka Adebayo, a 74 year old granny.  Mrs. Adebayo must know that she just lost an opportunity to do one good in her entire 74 years on earth and she so squandered it.

Now the women who went half naked in her support might as well go stark naked in protest against her. The Christian Association of Nigeria (CAN) that threatened to go to court if anything happened to Mrs. Adebayo in the height of her being declared wanted perhaps would now chew their words. Obviously Adebayo’s definition of Christian Conscience did not agree with CAN’s. Some people even called her “an icon of democracy”, alas we know, she is nothing close to that.

The AC has announced its readiness to go to court again and challenge the elections. That is the civilized thing to do. But it hurts to know that while the courts take all their time to do their thing, an imposter will be sitting and administering a state. I feel hurt for the people of Ekiti, the women and Youths who came out to boldly express their desire for change. I feel hurt for the lives that were lost in the process. I feel hurt for the Electoral observers who the PDP unleashed terror on. I feel hurt for the soul of this nation. It was high time we stamped a foot strong and said enough is enough.

As Oni prepares to be sworn in for a fresh four year term, I wonder what his conscience (if indeed he has one) tells him. “This people voted me to lead them” or “I am a thief, I stole my way to power”. The things we see in this country makes one wonder if ‘Truth’ was still a virtue.

Sylva Nze Ifedigbo

www.nzesylva.wordpress.com